You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
North Korea, Best Korea!
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
