have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
