nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
MIDGETS
????
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
