yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
