I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize