I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
