so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
