so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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