He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
This gyro tastes like lonliness
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
