What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
