Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize
