I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize