ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize