Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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