When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize