hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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