dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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