like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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