Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
