But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
