Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
