her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
