Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
