I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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