4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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