i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
