its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
