belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I think I died a long time ago.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
