come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
