if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
