dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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