he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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