Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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