Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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