I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
