wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
