Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize