i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
