Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
