We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
