if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
