I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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