Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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