Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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