well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
