I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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