You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
