Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize