We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize
