i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
