Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
