she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
